Seduced by Fire by Tara Sue Me

Thoughtful, that is my best description of Seduced by Fire by Tara Sue Me.  Quite frankly, it is a compliment.  A book that makes you think, not just make you hot or make you desire the touch of another, is quite an accomplishment for a novel.  I say novel not romance or erotica because though it has romance I wouldn’t classify it as a romance, and though it certainly has its erotic points I would hardly call it erotica.  This book made me think, consider my positions or beliefs on things.  While reading this novel I started what I thought would be my review of this novel I ended up off shooting into things that will give me a beginning to journal entries.  That is a big compliment! This is a novel not a book designed to be learned from.

Commentary – Equal men and women at a meeting ie munch???? Not likely. In most communities there are quite a few more submissives, yes generally women, than there are men. Bands to tell Dominant, Submissive, and Switch – interesting idea – not terribly practical though since roles change and it is more a person’s role with their partner(s) than that in the community.  A sub can be a leader in the community and frequently the leadership is or at least should be spread throughout the roles – not to mention any one of those roles could also be another role depending on their partner.

“Are you here to submit and serve or are you here because you are looking for something you want?” The heart of submission, hmmm… good point on the author’s part. Many of us confuse the two or assume because someone likes one of the two they find joy in submission and service.  For me I find peace in taking care of those I love, even if that means my community.  If I see a need I will try and fill it if I can – though that in itself does not make me a good submissive. Quite the contrary in fact, I need the love and tenderness as much as I do the playtime.  Many assume that just because I’ve claimed the role submissive/slave I am a masochist – and that is far from the truth.  While I do NEED playtime, for me I prefer that it only brush on the edge of pain, rarely crossing over – though the longer I go… the further across that line I’m likely to need/desire. The pain/pleasure principle is something I very much do believe in.

Playtime, the connection, the falls of the flogger, the edge of the knife, the slide of the rope, being bound physically and yes, mentally by rules and a collar give me a kind of freedom from stressors that allow me to pass my days without the need for anti-depressants and anti-anxiety medications.  Going without that for long stretches of time requires me to find another outlet and often get back on the medications I had managed to get off of.

“I’m unattached right now – I told you that when we first met – but I’m not free.” Her fingers brushed her neck as if stroking an invisible collar. “I make do. I play with Doms and I help train the new ones, but free isn’t how I would describe my life.  The day he took his collar back was the day he sent me to the darkest, deepest prison imaginable.”  Wow. I understand that feeling.  Going from having His collar or cuffs around you to having them gone, having that level of relationship gone is devastating.  In many ways the collar gone made me feel more naked than going without my wedding ring.

The author also talked about the importance of safe words – now many of us do not regularly use safe words but they are a very important topic.  Before vanilla readers read that and think that means we play unwisely like Sasha did with Peter in this book in many relationships within that world a safe-word is “not used” but on the other hand even in a scene where we technically did not set one up Green – continue, Yellow – proceed but with caution, and Red – stop, are pretty much universally recognized and respected.

“A submissive is not weak because a Dominant controls her. A submissive is strong because she surrenders her power to him willingly. It is not a power a Dominant should take lightly.  Rather he should guard it as he would his life and when he returns it, she should feel her power increased because of his care.” This…. I need this reminder.  “You’re a submissive.  You’ll never feel safer than when in a Dominant’s control.” True…. And not true. True in that when in sync you’re safe, protected, cared for, and the Dominant has your best interests at heart and you know it.  Not true in that when you give that control to another you risk everything – you risk your body, though honestly that’s the easiest part, and your heart because when you truly submit the person you’re with gets to where it seems like they know you better than you do – and by God that’s scary!  Submission is not about giving something up.  Its about gaining something, wings, a Master’s job is to help you find your wings so that you can fly.

All in all of this author is one that I will search out.  Books that make you really think without being obvious teaching books is something I need more of.